I Changed My Mind

A change is necessary to improve my current mental health.

No circumstance is fixed in this life. Every living thing constantly evolves and grows.

Changes in lives, positively or negatively should be celebrated and acknowledged. The brave ones move forward, leaving behind their life mistakes and taking it as a lesson learnt. The less courageous ones keep on arguing about their losses until the world ends, living a ‘dead’ life by standing in the same spot until the real death comes.

I am the brave one.

I have regrets and guilt, I take the consideration of the respective others too and I believe any relationship that started from the wrong side would never prosper. “The continuous talk aka promises aka BS with no ACTION” burned me out. It was like talking in front of the mirror bla bla bla but in the end, it was just empty words. The lying, the cheating, the manipulation, the selfishness, the ignorance, the egos and other toxic traits are the ‘poison’ in any relationship or friendship.

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Why do people hike

I am not a mountain trekker.

Yes, I did a ‘day hike’ around Malaysia but I never try mountain trekking. The thought of having to endure pains and aches along the journey to the peak scares me. Why do I want to do that to my beloved self, my inner self voice talked me out each time.

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Mardi Himal trek

I decided to step out of my comfort zone and try something different.

When a good friend of mine suggested a new hiking trip to Mardi Himal, Nepal, I was skeptical. My body is not fit enough for long days of mountain trekking. My excuse is consistently the same, it’s not my kinda game. He shared with me a few beautiful photos of the Mardi Himal landscape, I googled more information about the place and later said yes to the trip.

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Just do it

Today is my birthday.

Yep … I reached the glory age, alhamdullilah syukur sangat.

Tbh minus these achy muscles and the sleepy all-the-time mood, hey! I still feel young. The “forever young” feeling is essential, right? The reality is another story.

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Leaving 2020

2 days more towards 2021. Cringe …

Even with C19, time passed by without slowing down.

2020 is almost gone while 2021 is just around the corner. Gone were all my unaccomplished plan for year 2020. “But they plan, and Allah plans. And Allah is the best of planners.” [8:30]

So, how my 2021 would look like? Continue cringing … I guess 2021 would be as bleak as 2020.

Staying positive is hard but that is the challenge.

To stay motivated in 2021.

Cheers

MM